It's never too late to find a soul mate

HARARE - I earnestly believe that true love really exists and that one should do everything they can in pursuit of this God-given gift.

Because God himself is love, there is absolutely no reason why one should not find that partner who will love one unconditionally — flaws and all.

It is possible to find that one special person who will not only be a companion lover and best friend but will also be ones soulmate.

But while I believe that these forces of nature can bring two very different people together, I do not think that people should sell themselves short to find love.

Many a times people are driven to do insane things all in the name of love and they end up being with people who do not adore them completely.

I am talking about the people who remain in abusive relationships all in the name of love.

Abuse is not necessarily physical but can be emotional. Now this type of abuse in relationships has far reaching implications on the lives of people.

It not only robs one of self-esteem, but takes something away and those who have these scars find it difficult to heal.

This happens a lot in the world we live in and I am especially hurt by how much women, particularly in the African setup become victims of such abuse.

When a girl is married off, they are counselled by their aunts and are told to put up with some forms of abuses all in the name of preserving marriage.

Often times, when young married women approach these aunts for advice concerning a cheating spouse, they are usually told “ndizvo zvinoita varume” (that is how men behave) “go back to your home and make peace with your husband.”

This school of thought has seen women literally become door mats because their spouses know that they can get away with murder.

Why this school of thought is being entertained in this day of HIV and Aids is a question that begs answers.

I know of a certain brother who is nothing to write home about. There is really nothing about his physical attributes that would make any woman melt.

On top of that, this man has nothing going on for him financially or career-wise, but he seems to just have his way with the women in his life.

This man has about five women two of them have little babies.

What really hurts me the most is that all of them know that they are sharing the same man.

The women who are all very beautiful and have a whole lot going on for them career-wise, but they literally fall over themselves to get his attention.

The man repays the overtures by acquiring more women.

But this is not the only form of emotional abuse people go through. I know a man who has his partner believing that she is not good enough.

When they first met, the woman was a beautiful size 14.

A few months into the relationship, he started to encourage her to lose weight, saying she would look better.

I watched her go through a rigorous diet and exercise routine which saw her becoming a size 12 in the space of three months.

As a person who strongly believes in maintaining a healthy weight, I was impressed, to say the least. I watched her change from unhealthy eating to nutritiously healthy meals.

But I was a bit alarmed when she told me that her man wanted her to lose more weight to become a size 8.

Because of the love she had for the man she complied and became so bony that one could hardly recognise the beautiful woman she was once.

What hurt the most was that, in spite of all this effort, the man still went on to cheat on her with overweight women.

I then concluded that a person who loves you can do that whether you are fat or thin tall or short, light or dark skinned.

My late aunt, Idah was probably one of the biggest women I ever knew. She was also very pretty and had a great personality.

She managed to secure the true love of a great man Ebby. Their love was infectious and they were only separated by death.

Watching my uncle and aunt who only discovered that they were soul mates in their late 30’s, I realised that one does not need to sell themselves short to keep the fire burning.

I believe that it is never too late for one to meet the man or woman of one’s dreams.

Several people did not meet their soul mates until they were 50 years old.

    Post a comment

    Readers are kindly requested to refrain from using abusive, vulgar, racist, tribalistic, sexist, discriminatory and hurtful language when posting their comments on the Daily News website.
    Those who transgress this civilised etiquette will be barred from contributing to our online discussions.
    - Editor

    Your email address will not be shared.