LONDON - I have a knack for good, clean humour and when the Zvirikufaya videos started, I was so taken in and amused by the humour the people of Zimbabwe evidently possess.
Then the darkness started to creep in, and the videos became increasingly uncomfortable to watch. The venom, bitterness and a nation divided was exposed.
This week I bring in a voice of reason. I could have been the voice myself, but after following Abigail Musemburi, a United States of America-based “Philosopher of Life” for a while now, I was convinced she would be able to infuse some positive energy by sharing some of her real talk.
Abigail writes about how she is growing and not just going through life. While this may not have a direct reference to the Zvirikufaya frenzy, she takes the reader into a place of self-evaluation.
What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. I concur. As I grow and not just go through life, I am realising certain sayings which seemed so cliché when I was younger do hold a profound meaning as I am getting older and wiser. One thing I am now certain of is that life is a journey; it is not a race, a competition nor a popularity contest.
Life takes us through high mountains and low valleys. I have experienced both and I know that without a doubt there will be plenty more high mountains and low valleys in the future.
That’s just the reality of life. Life is also a series of stages, and what you learn from one stage is necessary and equips you to handle the challenges on the next stage.
Everything I have learnt from my accomplishments, mistakes and failures, was just a preparation for the next stages of my life. So the good, the bad and the ugly situations that we encounter, as we grow through life equip and empower us to perform at the very best at the next stage.
Just going through the motions and never being fully present, whilst being angry, resentful, bitter, carrying unforgiveness and holding onto grudges is a waste of time.
After reading articles that showed that our emotions affect the way our body works and that bitterness can lead to illnesses, I decided that nobody was worth getting a chronic disease over. I had to learn to forgive people who had hurt me, let go of grudges. What a relief that was!
When my mother passed away a few years ago, It suddenly occurred to me that I had to grow and learn to appreciate my life. The shock and the grief of her passing made me question if she had accomplished and lived all or most of her dreams. I hoped that she had made the most of every day that she had lived. I started asking myself those same questions: Am I making the most of each day? Am I making every moment count? Am I living the best life I want to live? Am I achieving my dreams?
Everyday we all have to make a choice to be better or to be bitter.
Every moment and situation matters. We should learn to be present in every moment and to show up and be the best person we can be no matter the circumstances. I look at everything differently now.
The mistakes and failures I have made in the past, I now consider them great teaching moments. I no longer focus on the pain of the past, but look for the life lessons. Looking at life in a positive way and focusing on the good has really made me stronger.
My fellow Zimbabweans, life is all about personal growth and letting go of bad associations. Certain friendships are temporary. It is OK to let go of people who no longer add value to you. That does not mean that they are bad people, it just means that their role in your life story is over.
We all need to evaluate our lives from time to time. Let go of people who no longer add value to you; people who only tolerate you and never celebrate or elevate you. Letting go of certain friendships will make room for better ones. We are only as good as the people we surround ourselves with. Those with whom we assemble, we resemble.
Finally, Life is precious. Make every day count. Change what needs to be changed, be it attitudes or situation.
Change is a process, it takes time, so don’t quit. Our attitudes determine our altitude or what we eventually become.
Everyday you can choose to be bitter or better. I choose to be better. What’s your choice?
Abigail Musemburi is based in Texas, USA and you can follow her inspirational journey on twitter @absmus
•Pamela is a Zimbabwean fashion journalist and fashion accessory designer based in the United Kingdom. She can be contacted on email@example.com