'Zanu PF has stolen this election'

HARARE - This article was written by Tendai Biti three days after last year's disputed election.

Last week, Biti made a U-turn saying the MDC was outwitted by Zanu PF.


WE live in horrible times surrounded by horrible men. Men we have always assumed human, rational and real. They are not.

Since late Wednesday, July 31, we have been walking like zombies, drowning in dark shadows of pain and disbelief, hoping that this is just a nightmare where someone will wake us up in sweat and we will sink into prayer.

I am afraid it’s real. The unbelievable is happening. The surreal is playing. The insanity rolls on. The conductor does not pause; he waves his arms in deep satisfaction to the exquisite delivery of the orchestra. The crowds applaud at the orchestra of insanity.

They must think we are fools. To think that we cannot have a seat in Masvingo, Manicaland, and the three Mashonaland provinces. What a loquacious tragedy!

Now even those that they killed shamelessly during Gukurahundi have embraced them. Can you honestly tell the villagers of Matobo, whose children were mercilessly thrown down mine shafts, that they have now found peace with the devil? Go to Esigodini and ask them. Ask my friend Paul Temba Nyathi in Gwanda the same question. What a load of rubbish!

Can you tell the beautiful people of Gairezi in Nyanga North that the imposter Magadzire Nyanhongo is now their MP?

I have said it before, water in its flow will never defy gravity. A mouse can never hunt a lion.

Spare a thought for Theresa Makoni. Can someone in Borrowdale Road show me hands and say we voted Zanu PF? Maybe you are there at Sam Levy. Please get in touch if you are out there.

Spare a thought for Sean Timba and the beautiful suburb of Mount Pleasant. I caught them in Churchill Avenue in broad daylight. Innocent,  under-age souls dusted and brought to life from the back of yonder at Nyangombe in the middle of Binya road. They looked like Tolkien’s hobbits or should I say little gollums. They were holding forged voter registration slips. They froze and wet themselves when they saw us. Tired, hungry and abused — despite the structural poverty gripping them. This is how desperate we get.

The thing is we always assume the Revolutionary Party has conscience or limits. They do not. For power, they will do anything. When dealing with them always budget for the irrational, for the insane. Any assumption of sanity is wrong and naive.

They have stolen this election to the extent that they themselves are so embarrassed. I suspect they did not intend to steal this far and create such a ridiculously so incredulous a situation such that no reasonable person would ever accept the same.

But you see, once you steal, you are just a thief and you can’t stop. There is no such thing as a little cheating. It reminds of the Loot Committee of 1895. When the colonialists discovered there was no little Rand this side of the Limpopo, they started looting land and cattle belonging to the local natives. It got so bad that they had to create a little committee to curtail their own avarice. The committee was known as the Loot Committee and its first chairman was Thomas Meikles. Yes that one of the Meikles empire (113 years later some things never change).

Back to the Tired Party, you must be pleased very much with your product. You must be saying to yourselves, and your spouses we did a good job. Your children must be so pleased with you. “Daddy, we knocked out that Tsvangirai.”

“Yes son, nice job at least we can go to Beijing next week.”

“Thank you dad, I love you so much.”

“But dad, why are the people not celebrating with us?”

“No son, the people are stupid, they have been bought. You must never be bought, at least the Chinese are better.”

Well you did a pretty damn good job didn’t you? Guilt my friends is a heavy load. You can’t breathe when you carry guilt. Reputations, big reputations, have been soiled in this election. Some of you we thought were decent. But we have found you out. Little, conniving, spineless people. You have fooled a lot us. But you can’t fool all of us all the time. Can you?

But I am not suggesting anything. No, you did not force-march people to pretend they were now illiterate. No, no you did not fail to produce the voters roll to other political parties. No, you did not register people after July 9. No, you do not do that.

No, no you did not force chiefs, kraal heads and headman to force march people to vote at synchronised polling times. No, you did not chase people away from polling stations.

No, no Nikuv never helped you, never supplied with those fantastic pens with mutating cast ballots. No, Nikuv never helped you with doctoring the voters roll. What cheap lies!

No, you did not issue en masse fake voter registration slips to anyone. That boy Silumbu, the Daily News is crazy.

No, you did not throw away at the Sheraton unpalatable special votes against yourselves. No, no you did not cause the arrest of Morgan Komichi. I know people just create stories against you.

No, you did not print duplicate ballot papers. No you did not swap ballot boxes in certain areas. I swear NaMai Dzvororo, you did not do this. No, no you are not working in collusion with or manipulating Zec. What a horrible lie!

No, you did not transport under age unregistered voters from refugee camps and Border Gezi training camps. No, you won the election free and fair. After all, the people love you so much and are so grateful for everything you have done for us. You gave us jobs, functioning industries, hospitals and Africa’s best country.

Wananchi, poor Wananchi. You worked so hard. You won the campaign. It is so painful when some moron tells you the impossible. That one plus one equals seven. No it does not add up.

But Wananchi, we are not the victims .They are. We did not lose this election. We do not accept this result, one that is so unashamedly a farce that it is null and void, as President Tsvangirai said at his press conference on Thursday.

Wananchi, let’s remain calm and keep our eyes on the ball. They have made an opening move. They have indicated where they want to take this country. They have reflected they will stop at nothing. Very well then. Very very well.

Time will tell who is the real winner. Time does not lie, does it? It always catches us out. Yes time has all the time in the world. Only fools think they can steal from it. Or fornicate with it. No.

Now I am told they are desperately looking for some diversion from the grand theft. They are always good at that. Something to divert the people’s pain.

I am also told that they want retribution. That violence will erupt against our people. That they will seek to kill, assassinate and arrest. But guys you have won the election. Get on with governance. I am also told that they also want to push us into some other government of national unity, or some variant of it.

But Wananchi, those who have won must govern on their own. Tongai Tione. Zikomo!

Comments (8)

So what has changed now Cde Biti? Why are you praising these Zanoids for having had a wonderful election strategy?

Musorodamba - 9 March 2014

I have not changed my stance towards ZANU PF. ZANU PF is a kleptocracy - a government run by thieves. They stole the July 31, 2013 elections with the help of NIKUV and the Chinese Communist Party. It appears the Daily News journalist who covered the discussion forum missed the gist of my analysis of the situation. What I meant was that the opposition needs to reinvent itself in the face of ZANU PF propaganda. We need to simplify our message to suit our audiences without necessarily compromising our principles. It seems I should have simplified my message for the benefit of the likes of your Lloyd Mbiba who simply did not get my message.

Tendai Biti - 10 March 2014

Biti warasika naMangoma wako. Just join ZANU nad not waste out time. Kukara nehumbimbindoga ndizvo zvinokunetsai. Maravidzwa uchi naGideon Gono zve? mastatements mabaiwa nekupidigura zve? Zvinotapira!

Graca Machel - 10 March 2014

Thanks for the response Honorable Biti, but is the house on fire? Why are you giving ZANU PF thieves nguva to divert from their corruption activities. now the news all day its MDC-T chazoti hee chakazoti diverting us from the salarygate.

Wings of change - 10 March 2014

We have been diverted from real pressing issues zvokwadi eg corruption. The positives of whats happening in MDC is that Tsvangirai is now engaging the electorate instead of spending time being massaged by Elizabeth. Hate or like Julius Malema, that small boy knows how to engage the electorate. Simple manifestoes, door to door campaign (the ones we used to do kuUZ), singing and the most sexed words when describing Jacob Zuma. I see Tsvangirai is now trying to do that, what he didnt do when he was a PM. But these squabbles mean the end is nigh for MDC and ZANU PF is smelling a big kill. Neither Morgan or Tendai can ever get the same votes MDC got in 2000, 2002, 2005, 2008 and 2013 and all these years you won and lost in the collective. Anyway the donors are also not being straight with the MDC. They are now tired with the change agenda. They now want to sponsor the ZANU PF government and they will start in November

Courage - 10 March 2014

Just yesterday , in court , proving that the election was rigged Biti was saying that there were ,in hired zupco buses full of, people who looked like from north Africa who were voting .. suddenly now the zanu pf msg resonated with North africans as well..and zanu pf won fair and square.. ? Biti you are MONEY Hungry and very Corruptible. Look you got it all wrong when a few years ago you were in the forefront that Gono needs to be in front of a "Firing Squad" for looting this country. Suddenly you are representing him in court for stealing money. You are not consistent and history is littered with characters that fall by the wayside for such antics.

Mupinyu Wasvotoka - 10 March 2014

Mukoma Biti were those pictures you posted fake? At a Mtoko polling station in the town centre there were 25% assisted voters, including headmasters, teachers and nurses. A woman came in late having frutlessly failed to find here name at any of the polling stations near her homestead simply asking to not vote but just to dip her finger in the "delible" indelible ink. Bond paper Voting slips since when? There was no message for the Z party Mr B. Why it in 2008 there was an recount and audit of presidintial ballot. In 2002 and 2013 it was refused. Mr. B if you win because of your superior strategy surely with a margin of almost 900000 surely knowing how some people like to gloat would a recount/audit be in order (media witnessing) just to win for the second time??

What Now - 10 March 2014

Biti adhakwa nekukara chisimba. Manje your greediness ichakuita kuti usare shure. Bata hana. Bapu warinyanya!

Tongogara - 10 March 2014

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